On this blog I
will share how we at
Soma Communities are working
out the multiplication of Gospel-Centered Missional Churches that plant the Gospel, Make Disciples and see new Churches started.
Much of the content of this blog will be around the Gospel Message, Gospel Identities and Gospel Rhythms of Life that a Missional Community needs to believe, embrace and embody.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Share your Thoughts from Assignment/Training
If some of you have followed through with "Engage in The Story" training, please share your thoughts, ideas, struggles, etc...
I would love to have us all learn together from this exercise.
I have found through engaging the story, that with a particular non-believer the method is going to be the hurdle. A woman I work with switches between speaking lovingly of her dad and talking about how he made her miserable as a child/teenager by being overbearing and very strict.
As soon as she could she moved out, joined the Navy and not having been around men in a social environment before (her words) she didn't know how to relate and became pregnant with a man who promptly left. She was forced to raise her son on her own.
Her current situation is probably not that uncommon. She is a single mom living with her 19 year-old son who is married with a child. She is the sole breadwinner of the household.
As a result, her view of men is complicated. She is constantly trying to prove her worth by talking down to people (especially men) and asserting her own competance and independance but at the same time complaining that she has gotten the short end of the stick and that everyone everywhere owes her something.
Any opportunity she has to be right she takes, often she hasn't thought it through and finds out she's made a mistake and then gets extremely defensive about it.
She and I don't get along well and often but heads. By engaging the story I have been able to uncover some of my own baggage. Whoo Hoo!
But as for Creator, Fall, Redemption, Restoration my initial reading is:
Creator: Father
Fall: Didn't giver her the freedom and encouragement she needed.
Redemption: Navy, being sole breadwinner, taking care of her child.
Restoration:Living a life where she is the captain of her soul, through thick or thin.
I was hoping to have some other people comment before I did.
Anyway, the good news for her is the same as it is for all of us. We have a Father that loves us and delights in us, not because of anything we've done or because He's willing to look past our sin, but because of the Great Exchange: Christ Righteousness for our sinfulness.
The question is, how does one communicate this? The problem is one of acceptance. For her, its possible that her issues with her dad are problem enough and she'd rather not hear about a Holy Deity that demands perfection. If that's the case than Christ's sacrifice is a non issue and her concern will be 'how can Christ help me with my did?'
In an odd way, the biggest hurdle is telling people that despite all their earthly problems and concerns there is a much MUCH greater issue that they need to deal with, namely sin. When you try to sell someone with the idea that you know both the problem and the solution you sound like a charlatan; a door to door sells men that knows how to get a good deal on Aluminum Siding even though the homeowner likes the way the house looks but really needs someone to fix the plumbing. You don't have the answer to what they perceive their real problem to be.
So how does a person use the Gospel to reach the more tangible need first to help demonstrate its validity? Or do you simply trust that the struggle with the Creator is innate and universal regardless of how subconscious it may appear?
Update: in a conversation about diamonds of all things (in the interest of full disclosure, I think they're kind of dumb)the lady I've spoken of in the past said "The reason I'm single is because I'm deathly afraid of being under a mans thumb because of the way I was treated by my father when I was younger."
Thanks for sharing, William. I know for me this assignment has been really helpful in having a process to know someone's Gospel barriers. It has helped me be more intentional about not only what I say to the person, but also the way I say it.
Caesar and I have talked about discerning different seasons in bringing the Gospel to people. There is a time of tilling, sowing, watering, and reaping. Perhaps there are more stages, but the main point we brought out of this is that we often want to go straight into sowing seads, and forget that first we must till the ground of building a relational trust with that person.
So I'd say Willy would do good in asking God to make him a good brother to this woman he works with, especially if at this point there is not much of a relationship going on. Bring food in during a shift for everyone, encourage her in the good job that she does, seek to build a team mentality with her, earn her trust. Then, after that I'm sure she'd be much more willing to hear about the Father in Heaven, because you can point to how you've loved her as an example of His greater love.
As a single guy engaging with other single guys, I find a difficult time knowing how to disciple them when their lives are very devoted around playing video games.
With multi-player being such a big part of video games now, they can become never-ending, some even creating their own worlds (MMORPGs like World of Warcraft). When I did this assignment, I did it with my roommate who plays that game (for reference, he's not one who acknowledges that Christ is King of Kings), and I could see that he's replacing his life story (which he doesn't find purpose or excitement in) with the story found in this game.
So how do you engage people who really just want to immerse themselves in something like this all the time? I see that bringing a community around them, like my missional community, seems to be an obvious answer, and a good one at that.
But, is there anything else? As with any idol, I think that you have to show them something that is more beautiful (Christ) and then pray that the Holy Spirit convicts them of their idol(s) so they can see clearly that Christ is truly the more beautiful object of affection. But what specifically is it about Christ that is easily recognizable as more beautiful to someone who idolizes entertainment and escapism?
Well in the case of World of Warcraft I think things like that let people feel part of a bigger story without risk of pain. Remember the Men's Retreat when we talked about the adventure every man wants to be a part of, well there you go.
I speak from experience here, men want adventure but can be afraid of the cost of the sacrifice; afraid of looking foolish.
I may sound simple but I would recommend as a first step, invite the guy on projects (or as he will undoubtedly know them; quest). Start with going to buy groceries for someone or helping someone jump start a car (that one is hard to plan for). Invite him to do things that remind him he's alive and can affect the world.
As the tasks get bigger or the cost gets to be too much for him, bring him to the Gospel. Using language he will relate to. A King sought to save His people from a power the crouched at their doors waiting to destroy them. He humbled Himself and became one of them and then became their sin; took their punishment and rose again.
Anyone who plays games with swords will relate to this story, they'll understand it in ways a seminary student wouldn't but are no less true. Then remind him that he is part of the same story and the things he wants to do in the game have a real life counterpart and he no longer has to worry about sacrifice because the big one was already made for him.
I have found through engaging the story, that with a particular non-believer the method is going to be the hurdle. A woman I work with switches between speaking lovingly of her dad and talking about how he made her miserable as a child/teenager by being overbearing and very strict.
ReplyDeleteAs soon as she could she moved out, joined the Navy and not having been around men in a social environment before (her words) she didn't know how to relate and became pregnant with a man who promptly left. She was forced to raise her son on her own.
Her current situation is probably not that uncommon. She is a single mom living with her 19 year-old son who is married with a child. She is the sole breadwinner of the household.
As a result, her view of men is complicated. She is constantly trying to prove her worth by talking down to people (especially men) and asserting her own competance and independance but at the same time complaining that she has gotten the short end of the stick and that everyone everywhere owes her something.
Any opportunity she has to be right she takes, often she hasn't thought it through and finds out she's made a mistake and then gets extremely defensive about it.
She and I don't get along well and often but heads. By engaging the story I have been able to uncover some of my own baggage. Whoo Hoo!
But as for Creator, Fall, Redemption, Restoration
my initial reading is:
Creator: Father
Fall: Didn't giver her the freedom and encouragement she needed.
Redemption: Navy, being sole breadwinner, taking care of her child.
Restoration:Living a life where she is the captain of her soul, through thick or thin.
William or others...How could the Gospel Storyline be "Good News" for her?
ReplyDeleteI was hoping to have some other people comment before I did.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, the good news for her is the same as it is for all of us. We have a Father that loves us and delights in us, not because of anything we've done or because He's willing to look past our sin, but because of the Great Exchange: Christ Righteousness for our sinfulness.
The question is, how does one communicate this? The problem is one of acceptance. For her, its possible that her issues with her dad are problem enough and she'd rather not hear about a Holy Deity that demands perfection. If that's the case than Christ's sacrifice is a non issue and her concern will be 'how can Christ help me with my did?'
In an odd way, the biggest hurdle is telling people that despite all their earthly problems and concerns there is a much MUCH greater issue that they need to deal with, namely sin. When you try to sell someone with the idea that you know both the problem and the solution you sound like a charlatan; a door to door sells men that knows how to get a good deal on Aluminum Siding even though the homeowner likes the way the house looks but really needs someone to fix the plumbing. You don't have the answer to what they perceive their real problem to be.
So how does a person use the Gospel to reach the more tangible need first to help demonstrate its validity? Or do you simply trust that the struggle with the Creator is innate and universal regardless of how subconscious it may appear?
Update: in a conversation about diamonds of all things (in the interest of full disclosure, I think they're kind of dumb)the lady I've spoken of in the past said "The reason I'm single is because I'm deathly afraid of being under a mans thumb because of the way I was treated by my father when I was younger."
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing, William. I know for me this assignment has been really helpful in having a process to know someone's Gospel barriers. It has helped me be more intentional about not only what I say to the person, but also the way I say it.
ReplyDeleteCaesar and I have talked about discerning different seasons in bringing the Gospel to people. There is a time of tilling, sowing, watering, and reaping. Perhaps there are more stages, but the main point we brought out of this is that we often want to go straight into sowing seads, and forget that first we must till the ground of building a relational trust with that person.
So I'd say Willy would do good in asking God to make him a good brother to this woman he works with, especially if at this point there is not much of a relationship going on. Bring food in during a shift for everyone, encourage her in the good job that she does, seek to build a team mentality with her, earn her trust. Then, after that I'm sure she'd be much more willing to hear about the Father in Heaven, because you can point to how you've loved her as an example of His greater love.
Hope this helps!
As a single guy engaging with other single guys, I find a difficult time knowing how to disciple them when their lives are very devoted around playing video games.
ReplyDeleteWith multi-player being such a big part of video games now, they can become never-ending, some even creating their own worlds (MMORPGs like World of Warcraft). When I did this assignment, I did it with my roommate who plays that game (for reference, he's not one who acknowledges that Christ is King of Kings), and I could see that he's replacing his life story (which he doesn't find purpose or excitement in) with the story found in this game.
So how do you engage people who really just want to immerse themselves in something like this all the time? I see that bringing a community around them, like my missional community, seems to be an obvious answer, and a good one at that.
But, is there anything else? As with any idol, I think that you have to show them something that is more beautiful (Christ) and then pray that the Holy Spirit convicts them of their idol(s) so they can see clearly that Christ is truly the more beautiful object of affection. But what specifically is it about Christ that is easily recognizable as more beautiful to someone who idolizes entertainment and escapism?
Well in the case of World of Warcraft I think things like that let people feel part of a bigger story without risk of pain. Remember the Men's Retreat when we talked about the adventure every man wants to be a part of, well there you go.
ReplyDeleteI speak from experience here, men want adventure but can be afraid of the cost of the sacrifice; afraid of looking foolish.
I may sound simple but I would recommend as a first step, invite the guy on projects (or as he will undoubtedly know them; quest). Start with going to buy groceries for someone or helping someone jump start a car (that one is hard to plan for). Invite him to do things that remind him he's alive and can affect the world.
As the tasks get bigger or the cost gets to be too much for him, bring him to the Gospel. Using language he will relate to. A King sought to save His people from a power the crouched at their doors waiting to destroy them. He humbled Himself and became one of them and then became their sin; took their punishment and rose again.
Anyone who plays games with swords will relate to this story, they'll understand it in ways a seminary student wouldn't but are no less true. Then remind him that he is part of the same story and the things he wants to do in the game have a real life counterpart and he no longer has to worry about sacrifice because the big one was already made for him.
That's good stuff, bro, thanks.
ReplyDelete